May 21, 2013

If you go to the gym, don’t do this!

Ah, what a great morning. I had slept very well and felt refreshed and ready for a good workout session at the gym. The legs felt good and strong and so I hopped on the treadmill and started walking and then after warming up I started to run. Mile #1 went by in no time. I had just completed the second mile when it happened.

No, I did not hurt myself. I don’t mind people running on the treadmills next to me. It actually motivates me and forces me to focus on my running which in return helps me to keep a good pace. But what I hate is when you have somebody stepping on the treadmill next to and is loaded with the smell of fragrance, Colognes, or perfume – or even worse, has used so much hairspray that the hair would not even move in a tornado. Today it was a quarter to seven in the morning. You do not need to smell “good” when you head to the gym. You will be sweaty and have to take a shower anyway (well, I hope you do).

In my specific case this older gentleman next to me had loaded up on Old Spice or something like that. The strong smell of it was already, but when he started sweating after about 10 minutes the combined smell of sweat and Old Spice was just horrible. I had no choice – I stopped the treadmill and moved 2 treadmills down and started over. In one way I felt bad, but on the other side I think it is kind of rude to others by going to the gym loaded up on any kind of fragrance. If your goal is to smell still good after a good 60 minute workout, then you have your priorities wrong.

So, this is just one example of what not to do at the gym. Below is a list of items not to do at the gym.

1) Do not check out your own pecs in the mirror – be it out on the floor or in the locker room. This is just an invitation to be laughed about + chances are high that the guy/gal next to you has twice the muscles you have and you simply look weak.
2) Don’t cut in line if your favorite piece of fitness equipment is occupied by somebody else. Try something else in the meantime. Cross-training is a great way to get in shape even faster.
3) Do not take pictures with your cell phone – no matter if you are taking pictures of yourself or if you are trying to get a snapshot of that hot blonde girl over there (you sneaky bastard).
4) Wipe the equipment. If you are sweating a lot, please wipe the fitness equipment after use. Leaving a pool of sweat on a weight bench or sweat dripping of the bicycle handles is simply gross.
5) No camping allowed. Taking a moment between reps on a certain machine or piece of equipment is fine, sitting there for 10 minutes is not. Others might be waiting to use the machine already.
6) If you’re too weak to lower the weights in a normal manner, then load up less. It’s very annoying if you let 200 lbs. of weight simply drop back down into the resting position. That metal noise can be heard in the Starbucks across the street. Accept that you’re not ready for that type of weight and slowly work your way up to where you want to be. There is a difference between placing the weights back down and by simply dropping them.
7) Are you a grunter? Keep it down. It’s annoying as hell to others. We’re all working out and are feeling the pain – no need to grunt. We know how you feel, too.
8.) Keep the distance. Don’t evade somebody’s workout space. When you put down your yoga mat, make sure that the person next to you has enough room to do planks and stretches or to do some yoga poses. If there are 3 treadmills open on both sides of me, there is no need to pick exactly the one next to me. If you’re lonely, then get a puppy.
9) Spandex for men is not cool at the gym. Simply not cool. If you’re a gal, perfect – those are made for you, but nothing is worse than seeing a fat guy in spandex at the gym.
10) Yes, there is a dress code at the gym, too. No Jeans, please. Get some workout gear. Also, the gym is not a night club, you do not need to dress up. A Gal in dirty sweats and a baseball cap who is working out is way more attractive than hitting the gym floor in clothes that you wore to the bar last Friday (you get the idea).
11) Get dressed, damnit. Take a shower, but then at least put on some undies. There is no need to stand naked at the sink brushing your teeth and shaving (yes, dude – I mean you over there). I understand that you don’t care, but that is not cool. Go and work in a strip club if you prefer to be naked all the time. Also, do not sit naked on the benches in the locker room, put a towel down first. GROSS!!!!
12) Was that you farting? Go outside or take a dump. You are among other people, some respect, please.
13) It takes you how long to get dressed? I understand you’re tired after working out hard, but if I can get undressed, take a shower, and get dressed in the same time it takes you put on your undies – you’re out. This is a gym and other people want to eventually use the bench where you have spread out your belongings.

There are probably a lot more things that should not be done at the gym, but these are the things that came to mind after I had the smelly guy next to me this morning. Some of the things described are really annoying and it shows how bad our society sometimes has become. There is no more respect towards other people. For many people it is all about “me, me, me, and me”. All they care about are them self. That is very sad.

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